In today's world, magical siddhis, charismatic power and unbridled knowledge will not do what needs to be done at a time like this. What is needed in today's priests and priestesses is consistency, depth and infinite trustability. What we need are men and women who can correct the errors of our ancestors and pave the way for the awakened generations to come.
The areas of life that are crying out for healing and resolution in our time are sexual trespass, anxiety, disconnection and isolation. Our overwhelmed lives are running on empty, our bodies dry and brittle with A.I. violation, and we simply don't know how to, or have the time and desire to connect deeply with anyone else anymore.
We are parched and starved of spiritual nourishment.
And so I question the purpose and intention of how we initiate others into the role of providing spiritual sustenance and transformational healing to others, and the various ways we may do that today. There has always been something of a mystery when it comes to spiritual initiation. And rightly so. If we know what it entails before we turn up, the essential broody element of the unknown has lost its potency and potential. Initiation has to take us into unchartered waters and not yet reached edges within our entire being. And it has to be real, and slightly terrifying for it to genuine and life-changing.
I now find myself reaching a stage in life where both men and women are quietly asking to be initiated. Not just to learn 'how to', but to carry the mantle of this great work in their body, bones and blood.
Within this tradition, there is a ritual called the awakening of the sacred body which is a full-body anointing to heal and wipe clean all and every form of sexual shame, abuse, trauma and unworthiness.
And so, for me to consider someone, I have to be sure that the initiate carries the nearly-embodied qualities of sexual impeccability, an open heart and a resonant voice that can guide, lead and transmit deeply felt truth.
Recently a man asked me to initiate him. He was not the first, as I had turned many away in the past. Not because they were unworthy, but in some deep recess of my mind, was the hesitancy that initiation meant sex. That it was through the modality of sexual intercourse that the exchange would take place. And that was something I was not comfortable with, and deeply questioned the validity, intention and reasons behind, today.
There has been many a conversation where I have been with fellow priestesses whose eyes glint when they tell you they initiate men. And as we know, from last year's countless exposés, this old real or imaginable way of 'enlightening others' goes both ways.
This saddened me deeply as I genuinely wanted and in many ways 'needed' to pass this lineage on to the men. There was a feeling of an existential gag around my mouth, preventing me from interacting with men in the same way and manner as I do with the women.
Clearly, I was ready to free myself from this belief as I found myself in the middle of a week-long initiation where a man was being taken through the sacraments of giving and receiving the Light of this almost forgotten faith.
It all just kind of happened...
The women felt safe with him. There was a full yes from the feminine. And so we welcomed him in, deeper and deeper into the feminine arts, into the ways of holding and anointing in the most vulnerable and opening of ways.
At the end of it all, I confessed my concerns. I told him that I thought male initiation meant a sexual exchange of information and he just laughed. I asked him, "what was 'it' that I gave you, what was it that initiated you?"
And he said...
"Your implicit trust in me".
There it is right there. That's what initiates men.
Comments
Sha'Aya
Incredibly beautiful to read…tears streaming down my face as I feel the recognition, the truth, the wisdom… it feels like your words are what my soul has been trying to express for such a long time. I have had the clear call to initiate men in this Sacred way for many years now. Then after my father had a severe accident 1.5 years ago, I went into a profound journey through my paternal lineage, my forefathers showed me the horrors of the wars they experienced, the atrocities they commited, the guilt and pain and emotional suppression, the disconnect from the heart (and sex/desire) and so much more…a deep, dark journey of profound initiation and healing, and through this something shifted at me and at some point I stopped turning away all the men that were called to work with me, like itbwas so natural to work with men. And I am touched beyond words by the beauty of what unfolds through these sessions and immersions I have held so far – I have worked shamanically 1:1 with men as well as held retreats/immersions with mixed gender but I am still only dreaming of holding group immersions/initiations with men… A dear sister of mine and I offered a men’s sharing circle called (deep listening heald by Priestesses) over a year ago and most men invited reacted with: what do you want from us, why do you do this? And we said, we just want to hold space for you and witness men in all their authentic expression without judgement. 4 men did show up and it was so powerful and healing, but that’s where I recognized: it was hard for men to trust and surrender fully and be held by women – and, that was the mirror too – can we fully trust, as you beautifully write: “with not a shred or splinter of doubt, anywhere”. Exactly that is the medicine, that we allow ourselves to surrender to the deepest of trust. Thank you, Anaiya, for those profound words that resonate so deeply within me.♡